In a brief
interview, comedian Jon Stewart gives some humorous answers
to nosy questions, such as who he is dating, how he compared
to Larry King, and how he felt when his talk show was canceled.
takes over as host of Comedy Central's The Daily Show
on Jan. 11.
So, are you dating some model?
A: Oh, yeah. Ivanka Trump.
She's like 12, isn't she?
A: Yeah, but she's very mature. I don't know if you've
ever really talked to her, but she's very Dawson's Creek.
No, my girlfriend is going back to school, actually. We've been
together for 35 years.
is a bad time to have a girlfriend. Your stock is going up.
A: You think? I checked my rotisserie standings. I still
look like a utility player.
How do you compare to Larry King?
A: Nobody scores more points than King. The only one
who can challenge him is Al Roker, only because he scores in
so many categories. If Roker ever puts out a music album, it's
didn't you take over Larry Sanders?
A: That was just the plot line.
there was no reality to that?
A: Every now and again, we'd think, "What if we
did do that?" You're in that After MASH scenario.
Guys are in a meeting saying, "I think people would care
about Radar and Klinger in Iowa." We saved ourselves from
Your talk show was canceled by Paramount, the company that went
on to distribute Desmond Pfeiffer and Homeboys in
Outer Space. That's got to hurt.
A: No. It doesn't have to hurt. You're a bitter man for
27. I am shocked at your level of bitterness for 27.
It's been tough.
A: I was going to say, it sounds like you've had a hard
life: a suburban kid from Jersey. Who hurt you? Did Carson hurt
you? Did Cavett say something mean? What happened to you, boy?
Look, there's a kibbutz I know. Honestly. You'll get your head
straight. Come on out there, knock down some halvah. You'll
have yourself a time.